A Wedding In Chicago

Design By Christopher Wiitala. Print By PTS. Photos By shortformelissa



Rabbit + Polar Bear = Artic Hare!



Two Of My Favorite Ladies Currently Living On The Planet Earth



Amy Nee, Making The Rest Of Us Look Like Pieces Of Shit



A Puerto Rican Cupcake Eating A Communist Cupcake



"Water Pistols. Jump Ropes. Rub-On Tattoos. Building Blocks."


Quick Highlights:

• Witnessing the wonder of two becoming one (with Azuree & Christopher)
• Drinking Puerto Rican Egg Nog (with RUM!) with Sexy Nexy
• Breaking at least three JPUSA rules with a host of hoodlums
• Making bouquets with the ladies
• Inspired late night talks with Amy
• Inspired noonday talks with Hugo
• Guitar Hero with Hannah the Canadian Slayer!
• Playing matchmaker with Daniela
• Shopping with Tiffany
• Spending the day with Kelly & Jason (Jack Daniels Master!)
• Crust with Mel & Julius
• Helicopter races with those leaves/seeds
• Falling in love with the girl in a rose-colored Volvo at Schiller & Damen
• Reminiscing with Mark Twain's Personal Recollections of Joan of Arc and George MacDonald's Lilith

My First Love!

Jean Seberg as Joan of Arc

That's How People Grow Up!

circa 2005


circa 2008

Top Ten Movies Featuring People With "Disabilities"

I have an extremely soft place in my heart for anyone with some sort of noticeable "disability." I still have this vivid memory of a man with Down Syndrome falling off his bike one day because he accidentally ran over my friend's skateboard. To this day, I'm not sure exactly why it effects me so much. I think I'm either supposed to start volunteering at a local home or eventually I'm going to have my own child who is "handicap" in some way. For now I'll just watch these movies and think about how retarded we all are!

10. Music Within
I've only seen the trailer for this movie and it looks terribly cheesy, but it brings a tear to my eye and that's good enough for me.




9. The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter
I haven't seen this movie either, but i want to for the following reasons:
1. I've been entrigued by it ever since I saw the book (of the same title) by Carson McCullers.
2. It's one of the only good songs by the band The Anniversary.
3. The film version stars Alan Arkin.


(I couldn't find a good clip of the film or a good version of the song, so here is a painful video for another pretty fun song by The Anniversary).


8. Even Dwarfs Started Small (Werner Herzog)
This movie will force you to ponder three questions:
1. What the fuck?
2. No, seriously, what the fuck is going on?
3. Why are Germans the most fucked up people on the planet?




7. Benny & Joon
What can I say, I'm a romantic. AAAAAND... I'd fall in love with a mentally ill Mary Stuart Masterson any day!




6. What's Eating Gilbert Grape?
Because DiCaps is a shredder... duh!

Trailer HERE.


5. The Station Agent
Peter Dinklage is probably my favorite actor. It doesn't hurt that Michelle Williams is super cute.




4. I Am Sam
If this movie doesn't make you cry from laughter and heartache then you are a shell of a human being.




3. The Other Sister
"So let's see here, we'll cast Juliette Lewis to play the mentally retarded girl and then Giovanni Ribisi can be the mentally retarded boy... they'll both fall retardly in love and we'll be geniuses for making it happen."

\
(No two people in real life will ever be able to top this wedding ceremony.)


2. My Left Foot
Based on the true story (autobiography) of Christy Brown, an Irish artist born with Cerebral Palsy (rendering his hands and most motor skills useless). DDL destroys this role and I'm majorly in love with his mum.




1. Sling Blade (BB Thornton)
John Ritter as a gay man is incredible. Dwight Yoakam kills it as the abusive step dad. And Billy Bob Thornton gives the greatest performance of "retardation" of all time! Any questions?


(Oh and Jim Jarmusch kills it too!)

Carminative Herbs

What appear to be tiny rabbit turds from afar are actually dried Coriander fruits (Cilantro seeds) that I harvested from the garden. Mash these golden nuggets with some Cumin and sprinkle them atop a buttery thick Avocado... there is no stopping the rampage!

My Brightest (Diamond)

One day I may disappear
Don't be too surprised

I Check My Look In The Mirror...

I remember seeing this album cover on my parent's dresser when I was probably 6 years old. I also remember saying Bruce Sting-sting a lot. What I don't remember is hearing this album jammed at high decibels while laughing, crying and dancing our way through it... not until about a week ago during the "work day" in the garage with one of my best friends. Thank you Cris Lankenau for doing something my parents failed to.

Bruce Springsteen / Dancing In The Dark (1984)

Why I Need To Leave This Country (While Still Rooting For Some Of Its Sports Teams)

American sports channels decided it was more important to show Men's College Volleyball and Historic Boxing Matches instead of letting me watch the Flyers come back to beat the Habs!

The Killer In Me Is The Killer In You

I spent the majority of the day listening to The Radio Dept. as a pseudo-memorial to Israel shooting Aaron's wounded dog, Buck, with a rifle.



Buck Hill, Rest In Peace
Justin Bowen, Gayest Hoodie Ever
Polly Palmer, Greatest Laugh Ever



The Radio Dept. / Pulling Our Weight

And The Daffodils Look Lovely Today!

I saw this note in my box of stationery and realized that it was destined to be in your hands. Doesn't the flower look like a penis with it's head blown off? I thought you'd like that.

- Azuree Maisie Norman (soon to be Wiitala!)